Most of us like the idea of growth, but it can often be very painful. Common wisdom is that the more we allow ourselves to get trapped in our comfortable, lazy patterns, the more inevitable it is that opportunities for growth will come as hard slaps in the face rather than gentle prods.
Which one would you prefer?
The opposite of distraction is direction, right! So, how do we direct growth into our lives?
Here’s a cute video with FIVE AWESOME TOOLS you can use to call growth into your life.
Where am I at right now? What’s happening for me that’s preventing me from growing? Zero in on what you are using as a distraction. Get really clear. You certainly don’t have to accept the situation as ‘forever’, but you gotta be REAL about what is the truth of your life before you can make change.
Journal. Write down the reality you’re faced with. If it’s especially hard, call it by its name (“I want to leave my husband”, rather than “I am unhappy”, and “I have to deal with my past trauma from ______”, rather than “I feel anxious”).
Talk to someone – a friend or a counsellor about what you’re with. Naming your reality out loud is a positive step toward facing and accepting it as it is.
Be sweet to yourself! Use kind words and generous thoughts. Cut yourself some slack. Have integrity in everything you say – especially to yourself. Instead of ‘Oh, I’m no good at accounting’, try ‘I’m learning to be better at accounting. The way we think about where we are at now makes a huge difference to where we think we can go from here.
Every single time you catch yourself being less than generous with your words toward yourself, stop speaking. Take a moment to think of a kinder way you can phrase what you’ve just said and then say that instead. Do not say “sorry” when you begin the correction. You are entitled to make a correction. You are learning. Go YOU.
When you are certain about who you are, there’s no space for any new possibilities to surprise you! Be on the lookout for anything new you may uncover about yourself. These teeny pieces of information can help you break free of any feelings of ‘stuckness’. Once upon a very difficult time, I told my dear friend, “I wish I was more resilient.” She sat with me and recounted all the ways she’d seen me rise and rise beyond her belief. My jaw was on the floor that someone might see me that way. Point being, that if I had been so stuck to my belief that I knew everything about myself, I might have missed this important and life-changing information.
- Get out of Your Comfort Zone:
Try a different route to work. Choose a different milk in your coffee. Go to a lecture on a topic you know nothing about. Ask for help with a job you usually lose your mind over. Rearrange your furniture. Learn a new language. Every time we do something differently to how we usually do it, we’re offering our selves an opportunity to stretch and expand. You might just like what you find out about yourself! At worst, you didn’t die.
- Ask The Universe /God / The Higher Power / Your Higher Consciousness for Opportunities for Growth:
You can ask through prayer, meditation or gratitude. My mantra is ‘Give me ALL that is mine’, and for me that includes everything that’s a bit shit that’s destined to smack me in the face and wake me up a bit more. I won’t like it, but I’ll take it. When we surrender to what actually happens rather than get stuck ruminating about what we think should happen, life gets waaaaaay easier, and growth is inevitable!